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Be Alert for the Signs of Homosexuality in Married Men

Signs of homosexuality

On dating apps and websites such as, we expect our members to be honest and open from the very start, and that includes sexual orientation. However, due to social pressures, many older men took the difficult decision to hide their homosexuality in their youth and went on to have a long-term relationship or marriage. Have you always suspected that your husband wanted something more than you could offer? Do you have a feeling that your new boyfriend may be struggling with his sexual identity? Our team has collated some tips on how to know for sure and how to move on when the truth is revealed.

How to Tell if Your Husband or Boyfriend Is Gay

When you met and fell in love with your husband, the excitement, lust, and romance will have carried you blissfully into marriage. As the years have passed, and the chaos of young family life has waned, have your suspicions about your guy’s sexuality continued to grow? Our advice would be not to panic and calmly think through the following signs:

  • You’ve found sexy pictures or videos of men on the phone or laptop of your partner. When challenged, he’s got angry or laughed it off as your ‘over-sensitivity.’
  • You’ve found dating apps on his phone or discovered a ‘second phone’ you had no idea existed.
  • He has had a series of close male friends over the years that seemed very intense and were prioritized over you. These men will have disappeared from his life very suddenly with no explanation. (An indication of a break-up)
  • Did he ever come home from a night out and lavish you with love, affection, and gifts in the days afterward? Did you get the feeling that he felt guilty about something?
  • You have never had a fulfilling sex life, and any talk about trying to fix the issues has always led to arguments.
  • His parents were overbearing, with very strong views on their version of ‘right and wrong’ that may have impacted on early decisions.

Is Your Husband in Love with You But Curious About Men?

Most happy couples go through struggles and difficulties. It’s something that can make your marriage a lot stronger. But being the wife of a guy who insists he loves you but needs to explore his feelings for men is a particularly difficult task. If this is something that causes you anger, sadness, and deep hurt, then you don’t have to agree to it. It’s not unkind to make him choose. However, if you’re open to the possibilities, then signing up together to an online dating site such as is a great idea. We are a discreet, safe site with a community of fantastic members that will support you both. Communication is vital throughout this process. If his adventures with men teach him that that is, in fact, the life he wants, it will be heartbreaking for you both. Potentially it will be a healthy exploration that shows him that it is you and your family that he really wants.

Can a Marriage Survive a Gay Affair?

If you are one of the women who only discovered her husband or boyfriend’s interest in men when an affair was revealed, we understand your anger and heartache. It’s a devastating blow that will take a long time to forgive.

Taking the time to understand the behavior by talking honestly and openly with your man will help enormously. Older men are from a generation where homosexuality was frowned upon, and not all men had supportive and progressive family and friends. During your previously contented life together, your husband’s urges to follow his instincts will have come in waves that will have caused anguish. It’s not an excuse, but it is a reason. Hopefully, your man will be terribly sorry for the hurt caused and is feeling scared to lose you. If you truly believe him and want to try and rescue your relationship, then therapy, counseling, and many months of rebuilding trust will be needed. Some marriages will emerge stronger and happier, whereas others will crumble. Be kind to yourself, and never accept anything that makes you unhappy.

Re-kindle the Spark – Flirting with Your Husband

If your husband is bi-sexual, where a person can have feelings for both sexes, then he can find you sexy and desirable despite an affair with a man. Re-igniting the spark you had when you first met is a wonderful way to build your confidence and strengthen the connections you have as a couple.

  • Remember the saucy stories from your younger years and re-create them. If you had a happy marriage before this crisis, then celebrate those years.
  • Go out on date nights for delicious meals, to thrilling gigs, and for long soothing walks in the countryside.
  • Travel to new and fascinating places together. Take a break from your normal life and all the pressures and stresses that go with it.
  • If you’re comfortable, and ONLY if you are, consider the possibility of your husband spending dating other men.
  • Make sure that you have something just for YOU! It’s not fair for only one spouse to enjoy freedom. We’re not saying you need to have a ‘revenge hook-up’ immediately; just talk about how your needs are being met as well as your partners. was created by a fantastic team of technical experts and relationship advisors. We have lots of experience with delivering a match-making service, which helps like-minded people to meet, date, and fall in love.

Hopefully, this blog has been helpful to you, and we’re happy to offer help and advice to all our amazing members. Sign up with us today individually, or as a consenting couple, to enjoy the benefits of being a part of our community.